Regular readers of this blog know that I have a new eReader. I've been enjoying reading a variety of books on it. The last one that I read was an Ellora's Cave erotic romance. The premise was yummy, contestant on one of those chef competitions falls for one of the judges. Much sexorating commences.I thought that the premise was unusual, and that the characters were compelling. But something kept pulling me out of the story. The sex. Which of course, is bad when it's an erotic romance. What kept pulling me out of the story was the author's use of words that I find to be remarkably unsexy. Refering to lady parts as "bush" or "muff" is just...blechy to me. I mean, really yucky.
The books also had all sorts of throbbing members. But it was the lady parts referral that really made my go "Ew!" Not that I'm prudish, but I find I have lots of "rules" when referring to lady parts. And I get it's a tough row to hoe for authors. I find that if an author is too clinical, I'm drawn out of the story. I'll never forget reading an erotic romance that referred to a woman's "pudenda". Now look, that IS the clinical term for it. But is there anything LESS sexy sounding than a pudenda?? I don't think so. Then again, one also can't be too porny. Bush or Muff in my little world are "boy" words. No woman in her right mind refers to her lady parts as "my muff" even when you're making with the sexy talk.
Like I said, I know this is a tough line to walk for authors. But, reading words like that can really draw me from a story.
What about you? Are there words you read during a sex scene in a romance that will draw you from the story? Or instances that you can think of where the wrong word choice made you grade a book down, or worse, put it aside?
16 comments:
I have no idea what a pudenda is. Sounds like a flower.
Muff is so not sexy. O.o
I agree that muff is just... Ewwwww. The one that I hate is the "c" word. See? I can't even write it. I just think it's a demeaning term no matter how it's used.
I totally agree that isn’t a sexy word but something like that normally doesn’t pull me out of a story.
What really bugs the crap out of me is when there are grammar errors and I have to read a sentence twice to have it make sense. I know I’m not perfect with my grammar in my writing but it bugs me when I read it in a book. I just makes me wonder that if I can catch it, why didn’t someone else before the book was published.
Hi Katie--first time commenter and new follower Beer Wench here. OK, so as a pre-published writer of said fun stuff I struggle with finding NEW words but will totally agree that Buff, Muff, Cunt, pudenda (along with twat, hair-pie and Ve-jay-jay which I just read in one and immediately threw it across the room because I'm still reading Old School paper books) are deal killers. I also get bored when a (published my god how did that happen) writer uses the exact same description for every single scene--i mean most grown men have more than one move, in my experience. As long as we speak of names for genitalia I will declare all of my works "Throbbing Member" free--but the Big Three of prick, cock and dick get old and sometimes I'll throw a "rod" or rock hard manhood in there---suggestions? maybe we should make up some new ones? cheers The Wench
Ahhhh, am with you on muff and bush. They just don't conjure in any way pretty pictures. There is definitely a fine line.
@Katiebabs - Wow, a sex word I know and you don't?? Didn't you have to take FLE when you were in fifth grade like the rest of us?? ;oP
@Lori - I know, right?? I don't mind the "C-word" if it's used in reference to a body part, as opposed to a woman. But I get what you're saying.
@LA - Don't even get me started on grammar. Have you heard the song Oxford Comma by Vampire Weekend? Hilarious! And written just for those of us who get aggravated with grammar issues in the books we read.
@Liz - Hi! Thanks for stopping by, I hope you'll visit often! Like I said in my post, I get that it's hard for authors. I mean, there really aren't that many descriptive words for lady parts. And some of them really will make me either laugh out loud (honey pot) or cringe (muff). It was more that I've literally never known a woman refer to anything on her body as a muff. Know why? Because it's PORNY! Ehem...I'm just saying.
we must have read the same book 'cause Honey Pot nearly made me hurl. . . which was too bad because it was in a pretty good book---but a LOT so I never finished it. i've got your posts on my writing blog sidebar.
I have 2 sites--one for beer as I am the token female owner of a microbrewery and serve as the naughty comic relief and marketing expert for the group. And one for writing and other sexy observations. My Boys (how I refer to my Business Partners and Brew Master) are my biggest fans on both!
Oh and here is my absolute least favorite word when descirbing female bits: Vulva--sounds like a Swedish car at best.
All I'm gonna say here is that you should not be talking about hoeing rows in this context.
*crosses legs*
Muff is seriously unsexy. Vajayjay at least would get a few laughs.
But is there anything LESS sexy sounding than a pudenda??
Dear Infinity Twin,
No, there isn't.
Love,
The "other" Infinity Twin
Muff and bush are definitely words that will throw me out of a story. You're right - it's just porny. I personally hate when authors try to avoid words and use descriptions like creamy center. Is it a twinkie??
@Rosie - Hi!!! Where have you been?? I miss you!
@Tracy - LMAO! See, I get squicked whenever Lora Leigh goes on about dripping and gushing. I'm all, "They make medicine to treat that. It's called a Z-pack."
Bush and muff are kind of ick for me, but only because I don't like picturing hair down there (if you'll recall my blog convo of long ago).
"Hole" is jarring to me when I see it in regard to girl parts. To me "hole" is...well...a different hole.
I hated the c-word until I started editing, and now I'm over it. That word is in pretty much all m/f erotic romance. Can't get away from it.
Whenever shocking language is mentioned, it always seems to refer to ladyparts. Why is that? P-word, c-word, etc. The word "cock" is super porn-y, but it gets few complaints. I can't think of a male euphemism that makes people go "ew!"
Maybe some of the distaste is directed toward actual female body parts. Do you know what I mean? We don't think of vaginas as sexy. And that is a sad thing!
I don't mind explicit language, even muff or bush. Cream gives me a weird mental image, and gushing is a little over the top, but I don't have a problem with normal-sounding moisture. Female arousal is very sexy to me and I like most of the naughty words.
Maybe some of the distaste is directed toward actual female body parts. Do you know what I mean? We don't think of vaginas as sexy. And that is a sad thing!
Jill -What a great point! You're probably right. I mean, think about in marketing. There are about 20 different things sold to help us with our "not so fresh" feelings. Personally, I spend hundreds of dollars a year getting bikini waxes, to "neaten" up the area. There's feminine deodorant spray, there's deodorized sanitary stuff. It's all telling us that that area is smelling, dirty, unclean, etc. I hadn't thought of it in that way, but it's a really good point.
But, still muff and bush? Porny, in my opinion. ;o)
Cunt. I hate the word cunt. hate, hate hate hate it.
I don't think I'd care for muff-have seen bush, don't like it but it wouldn't ruin the book, as long as the book was good.
If the language isn't too overly purple, I'm okay.
A lot of erotic romance is hard for me to read anymore-I love the hot, explicitly written sex scenes, but many of the words used-cunt, for one, will end up slowing the book down and too many of the erotic romances (IMO) the writers forget that the erotic ISN'T supposed to replace the romance-hot sex isn't a replacement for the relationship. I want, and need, both to enjoy the book.
So if the book is good and the characters are working for me, the language isn't going to throw me as much. If not...eh, it's just another reason to to aside that much easier.
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