I've been on a mini-contemporary romance kick lately. That is to say, two in a row. Both books were cute in their own way. And had deliciously hot, caring, wonderful heroes. And steamy love scenes. And heroines who pissed me off.So, I'm going to offer some unsolicited advice to authors of contemporary romance. Heroines who push Mr. Wonderful away because 1) they're not looking for anything serious, when clearly they are since every time they're around the hero their pants are on fire or 2) they have a big time career, and a serious relationship just isn't in their plans aggravate the snot out of me.
Why? I can't identify with the feeling. On top of that, in both of these cases, I didn't find the heroines' reasoning to be credible. OK, sure, I can buy that your career is important. That you've worked your tail off to get where you are. That you're too smart to fall into whatever pretend trap you think there is in having BOTH a wonderful job AND a man to love you. Except here's the thing, women these days CAN have it all. No really. I know a bunch of women who have both very successful careers and loving relationships with their partners. Does it take work? Sure. But presumably, if you are smart enough to have a successful career, you're smart enough to balance both. Will it be easy? Probably not, but hey, this is a romance novel for God's sake. Figure it out.
And yes, I'm a single girl who is still waiting for her Mr. Right. But I gotta tell you, if he came knocking on my door, and made my panties burst into flame, I'd move freaking Heaven and Earth to make the relationship work. So please, please, please STOP writing these heroines who are otherwise smart, but shit all over Mr. Wonderful because they can't fathom having it all and making it work. It's insulting and it pisses me off.
That is all.
18 Comments:
*raises hands for made my panties burst into flame*
But Kati, we need the drama, the angst the horror of it all because it would be a pretty short story. Sounds like Deidre Martin's With a Twist. The twist with this one is the hero is the one who can't have a relationship because he is all about his job.
then again is it not the excuses 90% of the heroes use ?
Hum...do you find it easier if it's a guy?
I like it better when it's the girl ! very refreshing :)
Amen sister! I know which book you're talking about, and I totally agree. Michelle & I were talking about it and had the same reaction. Oh heroine? Hello?! Hot, sexy, well-adjusted, caring, employed, rocks your socks off guy is totally in love with you and you're going to give it up for an empty apartment, no friends and a stressful job? Lady, you need help, a.s.a.p.!!!
Oh, and I second that on the flaming panties. Sign me up ;)
Pidute, jumping in here. I think we're pre-conditioned to believe guys don't want the commitment, so that's why I personally don't blink when the guy is running scared in the book. But as a woman, and one who recognizes the wonderfulness of this man who loves you, who you love back, why the hell would you give that up? She's not giving up her career, or her friends, or family. She's gaining more than she's losing. That's why bothers the hell out of me. Who cares about being independent and on your own if you're unhappy?
i see what you mean but me? i am weary of anything that change my routine (good or bad !)
It take me ages to adapt to new situation .
So i can totally relate to those women (It took two week for the Cookie to convince me that it was a good idea to move from a single bed to a double one ,crazy i know! )
KB & Stacy - I'm just saying let's have REAL source of tension, you know? I'm not saying it's a trend, but the last two books I read had heroines who made my radar go off because of this whole, "But I have a job, I can't possibly fall in love with you" thing or the "I realize you're perfect for me, and accepting of me in every possible way, but I'm not looking for anything serious" thing going on. It makes me utterly crazed!!!
Pidute - I wouldn't say 90% of the heroes, but sure, it happens with the boys as well. Here's my thing, and I realize this might be silly, but I expect better of the heroines.
So is that it? The inner conflict is just that they have a career track and they don't want to budge because the right guy came along???
Yeah, I'd probably get irritated with that too in a heroine, unless it were exceptionally done, say she has a career to take care of her month in a $90K medical treatment facility. But that would make the career secondary to the good old standby guilt to take care of a parent. Ok, ok, maybe not guilt, but I'm part Italian and my mom was a non-practicing Catholic, I KNOW guilt! LOL
I'm ok with the premise ONLY if there are compelling reason's why she (and, yes, I like pidute, I prefer this coming from the heroine) feels like she must choose career over Mr Perfect.
IDK if Instant Gratification was one of the books, but that was one of the issues in it. This plotline worked for me in IG because I felt like her focus on career and lifestyle (NYC vs rural mtn town) was more a symptom of her emotional baggage, than wanting her career more than the man.
If the motivation is career until she's convince she wants the hero more, it doesn't work for me. It doesn't work either if it's the hero's issue.
Great food for thought, Kati!
Renee - Why yes, yes indeed. Instant Gratification WAS one of the books that aggravated me, although this one didn't get my ire going as much as the *other* book I read.
I really did get that she had a successful career and that she didn't necessarily want to give it up. Except here's the thing: SHE WASN'T HAPPY. Sure, she was clueless about that fact. But so much was made about how smart she was, how accomplished. And yet, somehow she had no idea that she was happier w/the hero than at any other time. ARGH! Pissed me off.
Can you tell??!! :smile:
Oy. I actually relate to the heroine who pushes the hero away. I'm a commitment phobe.
BUT...I frequently find myself annoyed at contemporary heroines for various other reasons, so I totally get your frustration.
Contemps are my favorites, but they're also most likely to annoy me. :)
LOL so Kati do you feel strongly about this? ;op
I totally get what you’re saying. It drives me nuts when they push the Hero away for the dumbest reasons.
I’ve never had my panties burst into flames it sounds kind of nice :o) I think I’ll sign up for that list as well.
Amen! And where is the sign-up line for the panties bursting into flames? 'Cause I'm joining it :)
Hmmmm. Question if I may please? I get that the heroines' reasons were weak but..do you think it might have helped if the authors had expanded on things more? Or would it be like trying to fill a bucket that has holes?
Maybe these heroines are simply cranky because of the flame-bursting panties. Crispy bits tend to make a girl ornery, no?
;-)
[enters conversation on tip-toes, not wanting to add further fuel to the fire] [pun intended]
This is a tough line to walk. I like that these heroines are out there b/c it means that we have career-minded heroines, which I appreciate. And I agree with pidute that it is refreshing to see heroines struggling with these issues. But, Kati, I do agree with you that even stronger is the woman who finds a way to make it all work. But maybe that's her journey in the story, so to speak, to figure that out?
But like anything, it comes down to execution. If I feel the heroine is struggling with these issues, I'm likely to get behind her. But if she's just blindly rejecting the hero because she doesn't have time for a relationship or whatever, then that wouldn't work for me so much.
You're right about the heroine in IG. She wasn't happy. But, she also was so closed off from emotions and feelings (including her own) that she didn't recognize it. I thought Stone, taking her up on the mtn, and giving her those notes was a wonderful way that he helped her open herself up to her own feelings about herself and about him.
Sometimes, though, "career" feels like a manufactured excuse. Sort of an "insert conflict here" device.
Of course, now I'm curious about that 2nd book . . .
Julie - Thing is, your heroines? They never even have the conversation. They're completely successful and they are willing to get into a relationship with a man. See? I appreciate that!
I'm starting another contemporary tonight, and I'm desperately hoping this one won't have the career thingy or the "I'm not looking for anything serious" thingy going on.
But, she also was so closed off from emotions and feelings (including her own) that she didn't recognize it.
See, I can relate to that :)
Kati - I hope your next contemporary is a good one!
I'm with you. I don't think that focusing on their career is something that is a good conflict in this day. I mean, we all do it all and a woman who has something that hot and wonderful is an idiot if she says her career is more important. Good post. :)
I hear ya.
I think that's the trouble with contemps for me - because they're pretty much in the real world I expect the heroines to act like sane rational people.
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